Guys, guys, guys, guys hear me out. 3 years is quite a long time and I have thought whether to quit or continue and it took me three years to decide. I know what you might be thinking "But why?". So, here's why
BUT WHY?
Before I start if you are reading this, this your sign not to quit or give up on yourself and your dreams I mean it!!
I started blogging 2019 and I was loving it so much, at first I was doing it for the money but later on I enjoyed writing, but it began to get stressful and hard with school and what I was going through.
Firstly, it all started with "Low self esteem", for years I struggled with it, I felt like what I was doing wasn't good enough and I should just drop it and focus on my studies (mind you I wasn't so bright educationally but I am talented) continuation: neither was I in a healthy environment ( I mean an environment where it was toxic and no form of motivation. I was young I knew nothing much then) I have always wanted to be a writer more of a songwriter and singer. I started singing at age 8 and started songwriting/writing at age 12. The first song I ever wrote was "Happiest Moments" but I guess the little girl with big dreams had to give up at some point but she's back.
However it took me some time and convincing from good friends I met in school they told me I am good at what I do and encouraged to put myself out there and it took me about 2 years to convince myself to believe in my myself that I am good enough and I can do it and lastly to understand what they saw in me that I didn't see( I still struggle but it's like a 1% out of 100% so it isn't intense like before) there is a saying that goes like this "Don't force people, let them see", meaning "Don't force people to change, to see what you see that they can't see yet. Allow people to see, learn and realize and you will see them coming back to tell you what you said then was true so allow them".
Secondly it also started with "Procrastination" you already know what this is, it happens to everybody and I have talked about it on my blog:
Procastination was like an addictive drug to me then and that affected me a lot in my blog, today I will say I will post, tomorrow I will say I will post and days turned to weeks turned into months and years went by. I use to check my blog time to time but kept on procrastinating but guess what I am back and better and ready to give all I have got.
If you are still reading this thank you we getting somewhere
Lastly, "Impatience" played a role in this, now mind you I am not blaming the words for my action I am explaining why I did what I did but with words, however I was very impatient remember how I said in the beginning that I was enjoying writing and at some point I was in for the money, school and hard times came in exactly that. Now I didn't understand this line "nothing good comes easy", for you to get to where you want to get to, you have to work for it "life itself is not a bed of roses neither is it a bed of rocks it's in-between". I was always worried why am I not growing even when I am trying to be consistent and nothing is working and I let those thoughts feed on me and I never saw myself writing again. The hard times came and made things worse but I am so happy to announce that I will be continuing.
My childhood wasn't the best, but it was only God that put me through, he guided and protected me for he knows that I came to this world for a purpose and for that I won't give up on my dreams. Those 3 years of my life I was in University and I was more into my studies, trust me I hated school and it was a place I never wanted to be. But I hope and pray that God will make a way for my dream to come through and I am surely working for it. I am a singer song writer, an Author of a book (SAUDADE) soon to be published and I can't wait to bring my dream to a reality.
Please Read if you read till the end.
Sometimes life can be difficult, life can suck and you just wanna scream at life and wonder why you were brought to this world. God is able to take care of you so run to God. Remember "Prayer without work is dead" But let me tell you something you are where you are now because you allowed yourself to be in that situation, read that again. Don't be scared to take the next step, to move forward, to better yourself. I know life is hard but trust there's a lot life can offer than you can imagine. Life is actually good and for the fact that you're alive that should be enough reason why you shouldn't give up on that dream or whatsoever that seems like it's failing.
Thanks for reading.
Xoxo Grachiwrites
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